“You ask for something but do not get it because you ask for it for the wrong reason-for your own pleasure.” James 4:3
This simple verse is loaded with hidden treasure we can dig and expose… treasure that will improve your life and show you a way to enrich others through your actions.
In the verse preceding this verse the statement is made, “You don’t have, because you don’t ask”. So the basis of the thought is that we first fail and most often fail because we fail to even ask for the thinks we desire. The principle listed here is in direct reference to prayer to God, but as in most scripture the principle has a far broader application. Remember, we are “made in the image of God”, and many of the things that apply to our direct relationship spiritually also apply here on earth temporally.
When we have a need but keep it to ourselves, we fail in several ways. First we fail to document the need in a way others who might have the resources or desire to fulfill can discover. The silence prevents action being taken, but there must be a deeper meaning to this as God knows our thoughts… so why do we need to ask?
To answer this question we need to consider the thought in the verse above. We need to consider why asking does not always work.
Asking works on our innermost being. When we “ask” and ask for the right reasons we strip away the cover of pride, we acknowledge that we need another, we are not self sufficient, we, in that moment, become dependent. Where there is a level of dependence the opportunity for “interdependence” is produced. It is this interdependence that enables new discovery, new growth, and expanded forward movement, both spiritually and physically. But why doesn’t it always work?
The second half of the verse give us some light on why asking is not always the precedent to receiving, that being, “you ask for the wrong reason”. You see the motive behind the request is more important than the request itself. The right reason must be a part of the request. If your “reasons” are for the wrong purpose then your requests will be denied. But then we must ask, “what are the right reasons”?
The last part of the verse tell us that our reasons are wrong when we ask seeking “our own pleasure”. The motive being exposed here is selfishness. We we put our need first others sense that and pull back from contributing. It is only when you sincerely put the needs of the other person or situation forst that a consensus can be reached. Agreement is the key to fulfilled “asking”.
Personal growth requires a daily step by step reinvention of our body, our spirit, and our soul. This simple verse teaches us two important steps and gives us a path to follow to achieve success. The two negative principles discussed here are the principles of “pride” and “selfishness”. The two positive principles are “interdependence” and “a considerate attitude”.
These same principles are not limited to our “personal life”, but extend throughout all of our life including how we conduct business. In fact I would argue that there is no division between your personal and business lives. They and you are one and the same in both roles. If you “think” you are different, that some how you have segmented your life into compartments, you misunderstand the power and role of the subconscious mind. The duplicity you demonstrate in your roles in the end will distort your life and prevent you from the ultimate success you would have obtained in either role.
Take these thoughts, remove the prideful fears of asking, selflessly move forward seeking how relationships with others can benefit them a well as you, being sincere in your consideration. And live these principles in all areas of your life.